Unit #4 Update.........again

(She's a Thinker)

Allan and I went to the Parinatologist on Monday. It actually turned out pretty good! They aren't concerned about down syndrome at all. They say, the echogenic bowel isn't bright enough on the ultrasound, to be as concerned. The doctor was concerned, my initial OB, because of the combination of all of the problems together, it raises some concerns. But it turns out, it's not really, because there are no other markers for down syndrome.

(Her tummy)

As far as the heart problems, there is a small hole in between the Left and Right side of the heart. They don't seem too concerned about that right now either, because the baby is still forming it's little heart, so it SHOULD close up on it's own. But, just like Taylor, we will see the cardiologist, along with the parinatologist, in a month, so the cardiologist can take a look and see what he thinks. This scenario is all too familiar to us, so we are a little more relaxed.

(Blood Flow in the Heart)

The baby's birth weight right now, is 1 1/2 pounds. They say for as far along as I am, it's only 4 days behind, so they're not worried about that too much either. but they will still monitor it, because of past issues with that too.

All in all, things are going great! The little bean is a mover though. They were trying get good photo's of her, but she wouldn't hold her little butt still. Sound familiar? Another one is coming. HA! I told the lady that my kids have ADD inside, and she laughed slightly, but she didn't find it as humorous as I did. HA!

(Can you find her nose and mouth? *hint: you can't see the eyes)

Allan and I are so relieved and excited now. We are so grateful for all of our doctors that are helping us through this. They are just amazing people with wonderful talents. I am glad that they are all around us, trying to help us through this, and help us understand, more clearly, what is going on. It really calms our fears a lot.

Now we are stuck trying to pick a name.......ugh. I want the middle name to be Beverly, after my dad's mother. I figure, since he has 2 girls, and won't have a namesake, I can try to pass something along for him. We like Allison Beverly Rogers, Elizabeth Beverly Rogers, and Allan likes Samantha Beverly Rogers. He like Samantha because he knew a girl in high school named Samantha, called Sam. He says she was hot, so he likes that name. Idiot. HA! We'll keep everyone posted on that issue.

Sarah's Aspirations

Tonight, Lincoln and Cecilia messaged me about the Rebels basketball team having their first practice. Best of all, it is free to everyone. So we grabbed the kiddo's, and got them all Rebel'd up, and took them to the game. The kids were soooo excited to go. They got there, and instantly, they got excited about the snacks. HA! After a few seconds, Sarah spotted them...........the UNLV cheerleaders. She could hardly contain herself. She made me lean over, and whispered, "Mommy, can you go down with me to say hi?" So, Allan shoved his phone in my hand, to take a picture, and off we went. I got the attention of 2 of them, and they were so sweet. They knelt down and talked to her, and she told them all about her Aunt Cecilia being a cheerleader too (they didn't know her. They were freshmen.) and that she wanted to be a cheerleader too. I asked if we could take a picture, and they were so sweet to oblige. There were a few others that were trying to give Sarah their pom poms to use for the picture, but she was being so shy, she wouldn't hold them. As soon as we got back to our seats, she couldn't wait to see her picture.

Afterwards, the cheerleaders were setting up to do a bunch of tumbling and basket tosses. She was mesmerized. Every time they flipped, she yelled and clapped. Then the Rebel Girls came out to do a routine with the cheerleaders, and she stood up and danced and clapped for them.

After all of that excitement, it soon ended. They brought the basketball team out and introduced them. Luke and I cheered and danced, but Sarah and Taylor were petrified. The loud crowd cheering and the indoor fireworks scared them to death. After that, the cheerleaders were an after thought. Between being worried if the fireworks were making a comeback and eating the popcorn and gummy bears with Lincoln, she didn't care about them.

All in all, it was a really really fun night with the family and Lincoln and Cecilia. Thanks to the UNLV Cheerleaders for being so sweet to my daughter. It was one of her highlights, for sure.

The Handsome One

About 3 weeks ago, Allan had to have a physical done, and blood-work done, per his insurance rules. If we didn't get physicals done, and participate, our insurance rates for the year went up about $1,000. Ugh. So we were instantly on board. Allan got his work done, and found out that he is very over weight, his bad cholesterol is way high, and his good cholesterol is way low (no bueno). Along with that, his blood pressure is pretty high, and they are concerned about possible diabetes. This caught us way off guard, because about 3 or 4 years ago, he had his work done, and it was within the normal ranges, so we expected it to be worse, but not THAT bad. He called me up, and quickly told me what was going on, and I was just a wreck the rest of the day. When someone says, "If you have one more of the meals you normally eat, you are running the risk of having a stroke".......at 30 YEARS OLD!! Crazy.

Harrah's provides doctors, counselors, work out facilities, trainers, nutritionists, a nurse on hand at the corporate office, and on and on, for free, for all employees of Harrahs! So there is really no reason to complain for having these tests be mandatory. It cuts Harrah's insurance rates, and keeps ours low, on top of us not having to pay for any of these services, that we normally would have to. So Allan immediately took advantage, and made an appointment with nutritionist and the doctor, and started going to the gym, to work out with his trainer. He made plans with all of these people and has really stuck with it! Not only that, I stressed so bad, that I have been trying to change a lot of things at home. We threw out candy, modified a lot of meals to be more healthy, borrowed some healthy eating cookbooks and have tried a few things. I now control how much food Allan gets to eat for his dinners, so he can't keep eating.............even though sometimes he still does, HA! I even learned how to make broccoli. If you know me, that's a HUGE deal. HA! I liked it, but I liked it with Alfredo sauce on it.........I think that's kinda counter productive, but hey, I'm trying. haha. 

Well, after 3 weeks of this, Allan called me this morning, and told me that he weighed himself today. He lost 15 pounds!! It's not like Biggest Loser numbers, but he's doing so well. He weighs in at 295 right now. Since I've known him, he's never weighed under 300. He's always hovered around that number. I can't tell you how proud I am of him, trying to get healthy for our family, and making these great changes. Our family will be so blessed by this. Our kids eat healthier, I eat healthier, and we're learning how to portion things out. I have an appointment to see the nurse, and also to see the nutritionist, to help me with my diet, being pregnant, and come up with things I can make for the whole family.........that they'll eat, that won't give them a heart attack later on. I want to start these healthy habits, and I'm so grateful to Harrah's for forcing their employees to get healthy. If they didn't' do this, and Allan went another 6 months on the path he was going on, who knows what would've happened. While a lot of employees are really upset about being forced to do this (which I don't understand, since Harrah's provides all of the resources you could need to succeed, for FREE!) our family feels so blessed by this.

GO PAPA BEAR!!

Unit #4 Update

I was hoping that, with this baby, everything would go much better than the last ones, because it's my last...............NOPE.

I went in for my 20 week ultrasound, and the woman found Echo.....something.....bowels, along with a small hole in the lining separating the right side of the heart and the left side of the heart. The technician immediately wanted to know what my results of the blood test for down syndrome was, which I wasn't sure yet. She went and got my file. It said 1/5000 chance, which is great! But with the bowel issues, it's now at 1/2500, and then the heart issue, it's 1/1250..........not as great. I guess the bowel issue is a sign of down syndrome or another large issue.

I came home, depressed. Allan was really excited to hear what was going on with his baby girl, but I didn't have great news. He kept assuring me that everything will be alright, and not to worry. Then he started to tell me that it's ok if this baby has down syndrome, because, according to him, all of the families that he knows, that have a child that is down syndrome are just amazing people. The child is just sweet and amazing, and the siblings of the child are just as great. He said that, of course it'll be hard, but that ultimately, it will be a blessing............(I just love him).  I told him I knew, and I loved him for telling me that. I just felt depressed because I felt like everything has been going wrong this week, with trying to run my mom's business for a week, and then this happens. I felt like my job is to be a mother and to be able to create life, and I can't even do that right (pitty party for me).

As time went on, and I talked to a few friends who had the same prognosis, in regards to the bowels, and they said everything turned out just fine. I felt better, a bit. But then I went and saw my doctor..........ugh. She was NOT too concerned with the bowel issue. She was very concerned with the heart issue, and determining where the hole was at, is it in the muscle portion, or is it actually in the lining, creating a pathway from the right to the left sides, other than the normal way. If it's just in the muscle, normally it just repairs itself, as normal...........but if it's in the lining, it will need to be monitored VERY closely and have some possible procedures afterwards to repair it. She is really concerned of blood mixture. She also told me that the baby is SLIGHTLY smaller than she should be, but not by a lot. So she wants to monitor that, and makes sure there isn't any growth restrictions, especially since all of my babies are smaller than they were expecting at 20 weeks. They come out at a normal size, but maybe that is small for me. Instead of being 8 lbs, maybe they are supposed to be 10 lbs. 

So, while I am grateful for my doctor being so honest with me and being so cautious and wonderful, now I'm nervous again, HA! I just can't win. HA! I have to go see my parinatologist (high risk pregnancy specialist)............for the 5th pregnancy in a row. It's ok though. I know these professionals are trying to keep the baby and I safe. Just disheartening, but I know it will all work out how it is supposed to, and it'll be ok.

Visiting TC

While we were driving out to meet Heather and her kids for Donuts, we drove past a cemetery. I kinda tense up every time we pass a cemetery, because I know Sarah will see it and start asking questions, and I'm never sure if I'm prepared for her questions. Sarah looked out the window and saw it, immediately. The conversation was so sweet, I couldn't pass up recording what she said.

Sarah- "Mommy!! That's where TC is!"
Me- "He is in a place like that, but not that one."
Sarah- "Mommy, is that where people are?"
Me- "Yes. When people die, their bodies are put into the ground there."
Sarah- "And that's where people go visit them, right?"
Me- "Yes."
Sarah- "And that's where people pray for them, because they love them."
Me (getting teary)- "Yes, sweety."
Sarah- "Look Mommy!!! A heart one!" (Pointing to a heart headstone she saw)
Me- "How neat! That's so beautiful!"
Sarah- "I want one of those!"
Me (Kinda weirded out now)- "Ok!"
Sarah- "Mommy, I wanna lay next to TC, with a heart one. Ok?"
Me (Bawling now)- "Ok honey. TC would love that. I bet he misses you. Do you wanna go visit him today, after we get donuts with Hailey?"
Sarah- "YES!! Can I say a prayer mommy?"
Me- "Sure! That would be nice."

So after our outing, and trying not to cry, thinking about the small, sweet conversation, we went and visited TC's grave. Sarah made the boys sit around TC's headstone, and fold their arms. Very softly and reverently she said a prayer, of which didn't make any sense to me, but her mood was so reverent and sweet, it didn't matter.

After we left the cemetery, I asked Sarah what she remembers about TC. The first thing she said was him swinging her in her blankee (her pillowcase). Then Luke piped up and yelled "Lankee Game!!". I asked her what else she remembers about TC, and she said she remembers snuggling with him on the floor and saying silly things. I was happy to know that she does remember a few things, her favorite things. When he passed away, Allan and I were so afraid that the kids wouldn't remember him, especially Sarah. Now, almost 3 years later, in April, she still does, and still asks about him, at least once or twice a week. We sat and talked to Lincoln, a little after he passed away, because the kids wanted to play the blankee game, but no one could do it. It was, emotionally, too hard. But the kids didn't understand why no one would play. I told Lincoln, I didn't want things to be taken away from them, because he's gone. I wanted Lincoln to be a big part of their lives, like TC was, and take that Uncle role, and kinda fill the void for them. Not take TC's place, but be there, where TC can't be. I can't say how grateful I am to him and Cecilia, for taking that role and just doing everything for them, like playing and wrestling during Sunday dinners, and coming to birthday parties and just being silly and a part of things. It means more to me than they will ever know, more than I can express to them.

I think there are times, that I feel my faith is lacking a little bit, but there are times like this, remembering TC's accident and all of the spiritual, wonderful things that we got to experience and learn during that time, always brings my faith up again. I know my Heavenly Father loves me, and knows me, and has a plan for me. I know that he always has, and has always been with me, even when I felt completely cut off and alone. I know that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is the only true church on this earth. I know he has blessed me with 3, almost 4 wonderful children, that constantly remind me of His love, in moments like this, even when I think I'm not ready for them. I know that he has blessed me with a husband that loves me and appreciates me, sometimes more than I deserve. Finally, I know that TC is finally on his mission, and is doing such amazing work. But I also know that he looks upon our family, all of us, and is so proud of all of us, and excited for the wonderful changes that coming soon.

I just wanted to share that sweet conversation and my testimony. It's amazing what can come out of a simple conversation with a 5 year old child.

Halloween Donuts

Heather, Allan's cousin and my great friend, invited us to go with her to get Halloween donuts and hang out. We met her today, since Hailey, her daughter, and Sarah were out of school today for Staff Development day. We took over Krispy Kreme donuts!! 2 adults and 6 kids, in a Krispy Kreme. Doesn't that just sound nuts? It was a blast. The kids loved looking through the windows and watching the donuts being made and then getting to pick out what donuts they wanted to sugar themselves up with. It really was fun! We were surprised by a visit from Heathers mom and sister, Dora and Sarah too! They showed up about half way through the visit and had fun with us too. 

After donuts, we took the kids to the DI (Deseret Industries). The kids had a ball looking through all of the second hand toys, costumes, clothes, Halloween decorations and bikes. I found the greatest find ever, in the history of shopping finds! I found a train table!! The tag on it said $0.50. I knew that HAD to be wrong, so I asked one of the men that worked there how much the table was, and showed him the tag. He said that was definitely wrong. I asked him how much it was...........do you know what he told me???????? He said he'd give it to me for $5.00. WHAT?! I said wrap it up, it's comin home with me! HORRAY!!! I paid for it and we left! 

After leaving the DI, we went to visit TC's grave (I promised Sarah we would go earlier in the day). I won't write about that in this posting. It was so special, it deserves it's own posting.

All in all, it really was just a great day. So wonderful and rejuvenating for me and my kids. I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for my amazing friends, their children, and my family. I needed today, to just enjoy my children, my friends and, just enjoy the day. It was wonderful. Thanks Heather!! Great idea!