New Friends, and Old

Tonight, I went to a Relief Society activity. They talked about the treasures that Relief Society brings to our lives (at least that's what I got out of it). Pretty much, the biggest treasure that it brings, is the women of Relief Society. In our own way, we are each a treasure. It was a great message to be received. I think we need that reminder sometimes.

I have to say, I was petrified to go. Just ask my husband. I didn't really want to go, internally. I wanted to go, but I was coming up with tons of reasons why I didn't want to go. My husband had a friend in town, that wanted to go out with us. Allan thought it was more important for me to go to this church activity. I told him I would leave early and meet them wherever they were at. Also, I had to bring 4 items that described me. I would just like to know what everyone knows about me. Of what you know about me, what 4 items could I put in a small lunch bag, that would be my treasure or something that describes me? All I could come up with, along with my own husband and my friend, Amanda, was food. HA! That's terrible! But I am passionate about junkfood. It definitely has a place in my dietary pyramid. I chose a camera, since I LOVE to take pictures, even though I'm not good at it. I chose an IBC Rootbeer, for obvious reasons of goodness, a quilt block, again obvious, and a package of cheddar microwave popcorn. If I could include smarties and all that, oh yea, it would've been there. You know what Allan came up with? A dirty diaper, popcorn, Dr. Pepper and a mouse, from a computer. Sad. So I thought anyways.

So, I went. I took Tank with me, and put him in the nursery there (BTW, he did great! I was so happy. Thanks Brother Nash!!) and went to the dinner. I showed up a little late, and sat at a table that had just Kristin at it. I didn't really feel comfortable just sitting at a table full of women that I didn't know, or maybe did know and was still nervous. Thanks Kristin! Then Stephanie showed up just as late, and sat next to me. I was a bit quiet for a minute, but I knew her from the park, so I said hi and the normal, how you doin stuff. I'm so greatful to her that she was so open and talkative. I was slightly uncomfortable, and she made me feel so much better. However, when Star showed up, we were all slightly out of control. I'm sorry for steeling the reverence out of the party. Those of you that know me, it's not a surprise.

Really, I understood what they wanted me to get out of the evening, but instead, I got something completely different out of the evening. I'm really trying to get to know people that I wouldn't normally allow myself to know, mostly because of my own insecurities of not being good enough or having nothing to say worth hearing to them (immature I know). But, after talking to one new friend today, and sitting next to another new friend tonight, and getting to know another lady in the ward, I realize, I am worth talking to, I am a good person, I am just me, and I'm worth it. I wouldn't want to be anyone else.

I love getting older and you start learning things about yourself, that you never knew before. I always described myself as shy, and I thought, that's just how I am. But I don't have to be that way. I have to force myself to break out, and put myself in awkward situations, and see what rewards come out of it. Maybe I won't make a new friend, but I will learn more things about myself and help myself grow into a better woman. I love the old friends that I have managed to keep, since staying home with my kids, because they know me. They know what to expect, and they can reign me back in when needed. I can be myself. And I love my new friends, and the ones I haven't met yet. They teach me new things about myself that I didn't know. I love trying their hobbies and embracing things about them that I love, and trying them in my own life. I love their influence on me, trying to be a good mom, a good wife and a better daughter of God. I love that they help me, without even knowing it, figure out how to feel the spirit and focus on it more in my life.

I love you all. Everyone in my life. You have helped me become the woman that I am. I am blessed to have all of you in my life. Most of all, I am blessed to have you all love me, just for who I am. I am excited to learn what else you have to teach me. Hopefully, I can teach you something, and if not, at least give you love. You are my sunshine.